It seems like I see fire engines wherever I go now. Hell, I was surrounded by fire trucks for two days last week during the tanker fire. It doesn't usually bother me too much, doesn't make me sad and think of my uncle.
Today, though, I was leaving the gym, and spotted one in my rear view mirror, which inevitably got me thinking about my uncle.
I find I don't get really sad every time I think about him, but today it hit me like a ton of bricks that he's gone.
Today I just wanted to cry, and I think I figured out why the thought of him bummed me out.
My mom posted on Facebook that it's been three months since he passed away, and I was kinda like, "Ohhh, that's why it must be harder to think of him today."
I still really can't believe that he's gone. I mean, we went through all of the funeral stuff, which is supposedly supposed to bring closure.
But it's not really real yet.
I think when we all gather for Christmas this year, that's when it's going to seem real. I don't want to even think about how difficult Christmas is going to be. My brothers and I, my brothers mainly, usually park ourselves near him because he always had the funniest stories to tell about being a paramedic. Who are we going to sit next to this year?
At least we have another three months to think about that.
